Of all the emotions that empaths experience, the most powerful and potentially destructive feeling is anger. Of course, anger can be destructive to everyone, but for the empath it can be especially potent. The reason for this is that empaths feel first, and react, then think later.
The more intense the emotion the deeper the connection. The initial response for empaths is either to react with equal force to the anger, which often involves a very intense and potentially catastrophic outburst, or for the introverted empath to run or flee the immediate area or person emitting that energy. Many of these highly sensitive souls will burst into tears at what appears to be inappropriate moments for no reason.
Where there is anger, there is always pain underneath ~ Eckhart TolleBecause it is very common for empaths to be aware of feelings, emotions or situations, before others are aware themselves, anger becomes very complicated. If the other individual is a partner in a romantic relationship, anger can become a land mine. Ditto if it is a co-worker. Partners and co-workers can begin to pull back, attack or avoid altogether. This only fuels the anger that the empath is feeling and increases the stress and anxiety. An empath under extreme stress is like a caged tiger – pacing, miserable and just waiting to pounce, or escape.
Headaches, ulcers, high blood pressure or turned inward depression, insomnia, digestive issues all are possible physical results for the empath who cannot effectively process anger.
When I started doing readings I learned very quickly what unprocessed anger from others can do. Empaths “step into” the feelings of others and regardless of what is being said we will feel what is really going on. Old anger feels very heavy and turns into bitterness or resentment – extremely unpleasant. Fresh pain has a much “hotter” feel to it, much like standing to close to an open flame.
First and foremost, remember that anger is very often at the core about fear. If you as an empath can take a breath and go beyond the surface many times you will feel the shift to fear or pain. The anger is just acting like a shield from fear or further pain. It has no potential to harm you unless you step into its direct path; take it on as your own; or feed it with your own reactions and emotions. Think of it as a fire that requires oxygen to thrive.
Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die ~ Malachy McCourtEmpaths are gifted healers and your calm reaction to anger can have a very powerful effect on others, as well as yourself. You as an empath must calm yourself first and the fastest way to do this is to remind yourself that is isn’t coming from you, but through you. This allows you to step back and observe what you are feeling and seeing and cut to the root of it. If it is a romantic partner this is especially important for the empath. Bring the energy of compassion, respect, willingness and love to the forefront. If it is a co-worker then less is more. Your unspoken energy of compassion, peace, respect and calm can quickly calm any angry energy.